“Pregnancy is the happiest reason ever for feeling like crap.”
Ain’t that the truth? If you’re like me, your pre-pregnancy thoughts were filled with rainbows and sunshine; glowing skin, flowing locks of beautiful, healthy hair and a cute little baby bump. Instead, I was met with constant “morning sickness” (poorly named, might I add), less than beautiful hair (my hair actually fell out for a good part of my pregnancy) and more of a basketball than a bump.
I must admit I was not prepared for pregnancy in any way. It seems like just when you get over a particular problem, a new one shows up. I had about 9 weeks of nausea and, at times, I could have sworn I was dying. I lost 5 pounds in my 1st trimester because I never felt like eating. It seemed like this little angel inside me was more of a life-sucking alien. I came to the quick realization that I had gotten myself into something more than I thought I was ready for. A little too late for second thoughts though…
But life goes on and you learn to work though the misery and at times, even ignore it. Sadly, your “still-skinny days” are spend in the bed or on the couch with your head in a pillow and once you feel better, you are starting to get a bump that is more in the way every day. I can remember trying to paint my toenails somewhere in the middle of my 2nd trimester and when I finally finished like an hour later, I was huffing and puffing so hard, you would have thought I had just run a marathon.
Dressing yourself is a particular nightmare when you are pregnant and sometimes it feels better to just stay in the bed all day than get up and try to find something to fit your ever-changing figure. My first major pregnancy hormone-induced meltdown was over clothes. It was a Sunday morning and I was trying to find something to wear to church. I must have tried on every single dress in my closet and everything I put on made me look like a stuffed sausage. The bed was hidden under a mound of clothes and that’s where my husband found me, sobbing and rambling incoherently about how fat I was.
I am ashamed to say that was just one of many wardrobe meltdowns. It started with my jeans not fitting comfortable without being unbuttoned. In steps the magnificent “Belly Band” to save the day. It’s so cute and convenient, fitting over your regular jeans and covering up your unsightly bumps and rolls now accumulating under your clothes. At least for a while, you can feel someone normal because you still have your favorite pair of jeans. But let me just tell you, maternity jeans are wonderful! And so amazingly comfortable! Definitely something to invest in early on!
Another thing I was totally unprepared for was just how tired I became. I would come home from work and nap for 2 hours and then be ready for bed by 8:30. At times, I felt like I got nothing done but sleeping. And to be honest, my house could attest to that. If not for my husband, we may have never found our way out of the mess that accrued during my 1st trimester, while I was at all times either nauseated or exhausted.
I must say, I blissfully welcomed my 2nd trimester, where my nausea and tiredness were relieved and replaced with the appetite of a sumo-wrestler and at least some renewed energy. The next hurdle I faced was the dreaded 28 week glucose tolerance test. Ten hours of fasting, followed by that nasty drink and some needle pricking. I wasn’t so worried about passing the test but more about the test itself. I worried myself sick about keeping the sugary drink down and about potentially passing out. I was relieved to find that I actually didn’t mind the drink and the bloodwork wasn’t so bad. So, when I got a call from my doctor the next day to let me know I had failed my glucose test by 9 points, my heart dropped into my stomach. I knew I hadn’t been eating like I should and immediately began to worry about what would happen next. I spent the next week avoiding sugar, drinking milk and water (leaving out my much needed caffeine fix for breakfast – Coca-Cola) and practically starving myself to ensure I passed the second test. The next week, I showed up again, fasting, and totally prepared for the test. Little did I know, the sugary drink was twice as strong and almost unbearable to drink and I was stuck a total of four times in the SAME ARM for bloodwork. Plus, if you can’t handle the test and puke or pass out, you don’t get a do-over but get sent directly to the diabetic center for treatment of gestational diabetes, regardless of test results to confirm. Thankfully, though, I did find out that I passed with flying colors.
At 30 weeks, I am just now adjusting to my new set of problems. My weight has gone from “aw…cute bump” to “wow! Where did that come from?” I seriously feel like a beached whale trying to get out the of bed. I have found that exhaustion that I thought I lost a while ago and I’m afraid I have started to waddle. Only 10 weeks left and I’m consumed with so much worry, I don’t have enough room to store it, so I gave some to my husband. 🙂 The nursery hasn’t been started, our registries aren’t finished and we haven’t even looked at birthing classes. Plus, there’s that overshadowing fear of delivery day but let’s shove that thought back into the closet for now.
I will say I have both thoroughly enjoyed my pregnancy (especially getting to feel my little guy move and see him on the ultrasound) and wondered why people do this more than once. But I will have to say, I know everything will be worth it in the end and all this will be a distant memory. So, for now, I must keep truckin’…